Happy Happy Joy Joy

Today's blog post is inspired by the word 'Joy,' submitted by my friend Suzanne Vance (one of the most joyful people I've ever known). 

I actually groaned when I pulled this word (randomly) from my prompt jar. I haven't been feeling terribly joyful lately. In fact, I've felt like I've been teetering on the edge of that black hole we call depression for a while. But my self-imposed rule (in order to train myself to write about whatever topic is thrown my way) forced me to work with the word I pulled. And as I promised I would, I sat down and wrote.

When doing timed writings, the whole point is not to think about what you're putting down on paper. The goal is simply to write; to keep the pen moving and not stop for the duration. If you suddenly find yourself with nothing to say, you simply write, "I don't know what to say" a few times... and inevitably, something will appear. It might not be related to what you started with, but that's OK.

This timed writing resulted in a stream-of-consciousness list of things that bring me joy. To my great pleasure (joy?), the list was long. It made me realize that my days are filled with small joyful moments. Don't get me wrong; they're also often filled with stress and frustration, but they're punctuated with joy - with things that generate feelings of great pleasure or happiness (and sometimes? Just flat-out snorty laughter). Some of those things happen randomly; some happen because I create them; some happen because I need to see or hear something good, so I go looking for them. Regardless how they appear, they always appear. And that realization...

Brings me joy. 

(See what I did there?)

The first things that showed up in my list were my critters. On a daily basis, they probably bring me the most joy. Watching them play, getting snuggles from them (freely given or stolen), watching them sleep sweetly (until I accost them because they're so cute while they're sleeping, I simply must kiss them awake)... all makes me so happy. And it's not just my pets either. Going to the dog park and watching the other dogs I've come to know and love, seeing puppies there for the first time, seeing pictures of friends' pets, seeing funny or heartwarming animal videos or happy adoption stories on Facebook, watching baby sheep play or horses run in a field I'm passing - all of it. Animals bring me great joy. 

My girl makes me so happy. Getting a funny text from her can make my day. Hearing about a class she's excited about or a project she did well, or just getting good news about anything from her makes me smile big. Seeing her photos on Instagram or reading one of her funny tweets, when she 'likes' or comments on one of my FB posts, looking at photos of her through the years, or reading old blog posts about her - it all makes me happy. She is my greatest joy. 

Connecting with people is utterly joyful for me. My dad used to say I could make conversation in an empty elevator and, given how painfully shy I was as a child, I see it as one of my best qualities. Even in England, where I'm always told that people don't just speak randomly to strangers, I have the most wonderful conversations on the tube, in stores, in elevators, in lines, etc. People might think I'm odd (I am, so it's cool), but I hope they also leave me feeling as though we're not strangers anymore. When I worked my first event at my second job the other night, I was nervous about having to man the metal detector. Everyone rushes to get through and no one wants to deal with security measures (understandably! I certainly don't when I simply want to get somewhere). But talking to people, making eye contact, joking with them, and having them seem genuinely pleased to be seen and smiled at, made it a great, fun night, and nothing to be worried about. That brought me joy. 

I love being able to make people laugh, especially through storytelling, which was a gift my father passed on to me. Being able to do it in person is brilliant, but those connections in writing always bring me great pleasure, too. Facebook is my primary medium for that. I can't tell you how often I'm told, "I love your Facebook posts! I look for them every day." That? Brings me so much joy! Blogging does it for me, too (so much so that I wonder why I don't do it more often). I got a note yesterday from an old high school friend, with whom I wasn't connected on Facebook. She had read a couple of blog posts and told me I'm a "beautiful, gifted writer." The compliment certainly made me feel good but knowing that my words had affected someone in a positive way made me feel even better - completely joyful! 

Big, bold laughter that erupts when you see or hear something unexpectedly funny? Brilliant! My daughter once told me my laugh was "too big." That actually brought me joy (mostly because she was a 'tween' and I took great pleasure in embarrassing her). A lot of me is too big... but my laugh? No, ma'am. It's just the right size. I have funny friends and coworkers and family, and even clients, so I get to laugh like that often. And if I can generate the laughter for others? Even better! And speaking of laughter, the uncontrollable belly laughs that babies do? Oh. My. Word. There is nothing sweeter in the entire world. 

My list went on and on... 

Meeting new people who feel like old friends right away... 

Beautiful, sunny days, especially the first one after a long winter...

A juicy, sweet slice of watermelon or a fresh, ripe peach...

Seeing people helping others - in person or via social media... 

Chocolate...

A wonderful dinner or night out with friends or family...

Travel - planning and doing... 

A cup of hot tea after a long day...

Books that I never want to end because I'm in love with the characters...

A great new British mystery series on Netflix...

Sliding into an empty pool early in the morning...

A walk in the woods...

Graham Norton clips... 

Camping weekends (or weeks)... 

A David Sedaris or Bill Bryson essay...

A hilarious text from a friend...

Fart jokes (what? They're funny!)... 

Beautiful places that I get to see in person or in photos...

My Christmas tree, all decorated and lit... 

My Pinterest boards...

Getting a massage... 

The sense of accomplishment that comes from finishing something I didn't want to do...

The sweaty but good feeling after a workout... 

Rainy days when I want to stay in...

Walks in the rain with my dog...
A fully stocked fridge and pantry...

The feeling when I have a 'win' at work... 

Stepping on the scale when it registers a loss...

A clean, organized house (admittedly, I don't feel this one that often)... 

A feel-good movie...
Clean sheets (especially if they're sun-dried)...

Bookstores and the book fair... 

And you know what? Writing this post made me inordinately happy. So, thank you to Suzanne for 'making' me do it! 

I do believe that in some (maybe even many) cases, we can choose joy. But it shouldn't be a blanket statement, as there are those who deal with the very real issue of depression, which makes it hard - and sometimes flat-out impossible - to do. Telling someone in the throes of a severe depressive episode to just choose joy can come off as condescending, unfeeling, and certainly, uninformed. However, I do think we can all be helped by making a concerted effort to look for, see, acknowledge, and create the things that bring us joy... and then letting them live loud in our souls. 

What brings you joy, my friend? I'd love to know!

XO,